Kyla Cavanaugh

Aka: The 12 Days of Christmas

Everyone knows the song. On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me a partridge in a pear tree...

Most people think the song refers to the 12 days leading up to Christmas (Dec 12-24). That would be incorrect. Those days are a part of Advent which I discussed in an earlier post. Advent, for those who need a quick refresher, is the four weeks leading up to Christmas. Last Sunday was Gaudete Sunday for Advent. I wore pink. Well, rose. Real priests wear pink ;) It's one of my most favorite days of the year, but I was too busy to post about it!

Back to the 12 Days of Christmas though, which is the topic today. The 12 Days of Christmas are the 12 days from Christmas to Epiphany AFTER Christmas. Sometimes this is called Christmastide. It is from Dec 25-Jan 5 and Epiphany is Jan 6. What is Epiphany then? The Feast of Epiphany is a Christian feast day which celebrates the revelation of God in human form in the person of Jesus Christ.

Traditionally, the song about the partridge in the pear tree was sung during this period, presents were given and candles lit. The traditions of celebration tend to vary by culture, but in America Christmas Eve and Christmas Day are the end-all be-all of the Christmas season. The lead up (and shopping) is more important than the Epiphany and what follows Christmas. That's a shame I think, because when the ENTIRE season is celebrated, from Advent to Epiphany, it is really beautiful and moving. Just like celebrating the entirety of Lent leading up to Easter, it makes the entire experience truly meaningful. I know it can certainly be meaningful without celebrating the entire holiday, each person is different and everyone's experiences, but that is my thinking.

Also, thank you to my secret santa! I never expected all that (really, you didn't need to) but I think my favorite is the church mouse (who has very quietly joined the phalanx guarding my desk) and the racing up nuns. The nuns aren't guarding my desk - they run away from everything! I am not so secretly 10 years old sometimes. I am very spoiled! Thank you.

Okay, so this has taken me forever to do. I know it should've been done forever ago, hell I haven't even said shit to my sister or boyfriend's updates. Im such a bad girlfriend and sister, I know? That, or I've had so much going on that I don't know where to start and break free to get my head set on and ready to start this thing. So here goes nothing, fasten them seat belts and hold on tight because I don't have any brakes.

My sister is home! That's a good thing guys, you should be as excited as me, honest. She's been trying so hard to get where she is and she's getting further actually, and that makes me so happy and excited. I mean you should've seen her when we were little! She would stand on the trampoline and use our dog and me and my dolls as the audience, it was as if it was American Idol 1992. But now to see how far she has come, it can only make you smile so much more! I love her so much, and no matter what she knows I'm right beside her in everything she is going through, everything she does and everything she needs, I'm there. Always.

Just like Adriannah, my family is important to me. I love them all, even if we fight. Ahem, Blake. We argue, we bicker, we get frustrated and whatever else. But that's family isn't it? What would we be if we got along all the time? Obviously one of them people from that movie with Nicole Kidman, yeah I don't remember the name, TV is not something I watch all that much. That's off topic, but it's basically saying were family, and basically saying in my way I still and will always love you.

So what else is there to add to this thing.. I have a feeling this update is not only going to be long but filled with shit either no one cares to read or a bunch of rambles that have no sense. Maybe they will. Doesn't matter anymore. Just like when Jake gave my co-worker a hell of a scare. She came to me in the back room, her eyes were huge and she looked at me like I fucking murdered her cat or something to tell me that there was a cop to see me at the front. I couldn't help from laughing after. I'm not saying him coming to see me didn't matter, I'm saying its something not many would care about, or think it was anything special like I did. To have your boyfriend visit you at work, just so you can get him riled up just as he has to go is always a fun time. Always.

Speaking of work, I've started maternity leave. Not on my wishes and wants sadly. Doctors know best they say, even if Piper disagrees. Okay, maybe it's her mama that disagrees. Mmmm.. so I've realized come this pregnancy, my daughter is crazy about weird food. Or rather, makes mama want some crazy stuff. Peanut butter and hot spicy chicken wings, I've been liking the spicy stuff come alot this time around. And usually, spicy stuff is not my cup of tea. Rather, coffee? I dont drink tea too often as much as I should either. I'm not doing so grand with staying on topic, but yeah, I've had more time with my boys which is actually been a good thing, seeing as this time I don't have to stay in bed and Wyatt likes that because I can play this time. Starting with playing sea monsters. Don't ask, he has an imagination and a half.

And not only does Wyatt like his playtime, so do big boys. Jake gets his playtime in too, even if it's landing in my warm bubble bath fully clothed. Uniform and all. Wet. Sexalicious. Uniformed man. Mmm.. now that's even better than spicy chicken! And makes some good playtime fun for me and him. Of course I like him unclothed too, okay.. maybe love that. And the after sex is always amazing when being silly and fun. Good moods always help for good sex. And sometimes bad moods can turn the best kind of sex. Rough and hard. Mmmm.. Oh ya. I hope you didn't take me for one of those that give up sex easily just because being pregnant. If you had, you had me pegged all wrong. Yes, pregnant women can get some good action in too. Pregnancy hormones + Nikki = can't get enough. I'm not shy. If you know me, you know that for sure.. and of course Jake's blush makes for an amusing touch. Always.

Okay, I'll stop talking about my sex life and talk of that good ole social life I have. If that's what you call it anyway? I've talked to Lexi, and she seems to be doing better. I mean, better from what I can seem to tell. Which reminds me, I need to ask her about Christmas gift ideas. And I've met Hanna too! She's just as awesome and her puppy is adorable as all ever. Her life is so sweet, she seems so innocent though and it's cute. I mean, I don't know much about her, but hopefullly we can get together again soon. Both of them are awesome people. I need to get out more before I will be bonding with the baby that I know far too well already. So something fun sometime soon guys?

We also had a get together at Wyatt's school. I guess that sounds weird doesn't it? I said 'we'. I guess I'm getting used to we as Jake and I. Jake, Wyatt and I. Doing family things. Soon it will be Jake, Wyatt, Piper and I. I like adding in Weston, but it hurts sometimes. I guess that's the part of me that feels like the bad mother. What can ya do? What can I do? Except, to try and be the best mother I can for each of my kids. I love them all. But when we go to things as a family, I don't feel as bad as I used to? Things will get better one day, Im sure. Back to topic. It was fun though. It was 'International Feast Day' at his school. Just as Jake said, everyone dresses to their culture, but being were nothing huge, we dressed normal. Yeah, we suck. But, Wyatt enjoyed himself and found a few things to entertain himself. Painted his face and then told me he was an indian and then hid in African scarves they had for show to teach the kids. He's my little dork that's for sure. My mom always said my kids would be like me, and from what she says when he's at her house, she says he's identical. ( Ehh, he's not too bad for me? )

My mother surprises me each and every day though. I mean, I will say how I know I put alot on her with watching my kids. I mean when I was married I know that was all she did, watch the boys as Jayson worked and I did my thing. And now that Im pregnant again, I have also found comfort in getting back to two feet, but the thought of a margarita or some bacardi lingers, trust me it's there. I have Jake now too and he keeps me grounded to where I know I overstepped my path with him far too much to let anything cross it again. He knows that. I have that trust with Jake that I don't want to lose. And my mother sees that I think? I mean, it was the first time I could see her happines with me on Thanksgiving, I felt it. Its kinda scary. But other than things with my mother I also had the share of letting in Father Daniel to who I am. He's a priest. Who would've thought Nikki would wear a religious pendant and hang out with a priest? No matter what, Thanksgiving was spent well. Even if ya know, the turkey smelled like turkey?

And one person who also made it special was my sister. Even if so much is going on and so much is changing, she's always helped me work things out to the way that needs to be and making it all about me, instead of herself, that this time I'm going to be there every minute she needs me even more than I already am. This time is special for her. Throwing me a baby shower, and doing all she has done. The baby shower went well, I mean, it was a baby shower. I only had one with Weston, filled with people I couldnt stand and people of Jayson's family I have no want to remember. This time I had people I cared to be there, cared for me and my family. And Wyatt, even if he says he only likes pink because his baby sister does. I think it's a sister thing. I'd be fucking lost without my sister, and this time she deserves happy, and for that I'm going to be sure I'm one to show her she can be and shes strong and loved and I just love you Adriannah! Always.

We all have had our ups and our downs, but it gets me sick to my stomach when shit falls down with Jake and I see it even when he says he's allright. I mean, I guess it's the same thing that he sees and feels when he goes to work every morning and I tell him to be careful. That's probably different though, isn't it? But, when I know of shit that keeps making things tough, the times I want to say things, I close my mouth and bite my tongue. I mean, I'd tell him how I feel, but he knows. I tell him everything and I hope he tells me everything, but when shit like this keeps happening, it's when I want to say things that I don't. I just rub his back, hold him, cuddle and kiss him. It doesn't always make things better, but its relaxing to know you have someone there. I mean if its not all that obvious already how much I love him, then I don't know where youre reading, and who you have been talking to or what planet you come from. Well, wait I take that back. If you're that unsure come talk to me. Time will only tell how the pieces fall and what will be in the end.

To help in my way of being there and showing my love for him and us as a couple I did the cheesiest thing ever, and bought him an ornament. A gift he could open early. Him and Wy both. I had to get it though, when I seen Spiderman and MJ swinging from Spiderman's web beyond the city, it was perfect. It was us. Except, you know Mary Jane isn't pregnant and last I knew Jake doesnt have any secret web layer in his fingers. Though, Wyatt would like to think so. I had to get Wyatt his first ornament of his own too because when he was born, he was born so close to Christmas and for other reasons I didnt get him his first. So this year, he got a baby dragon wrapped around a candy cane, which excited him just as much as when he helped Jake put the star up on our new tree, decorated and beautiful. I even got Jadie an ornament. Christmas is already starting to feel special.

And can we not forget the look to Jake's face when the words 'I love you' came from Wyatt. I felt like a cry baby. I still do, I cry everytime I think about it. I guess it's nothing big to some, but to me to hear your son tell the man you love, he loves him too is not only the fact he loves him, but that it makes me sure Im where I should be. Do I wish he had said it to his own dad? No. I don't think his dad deserves him, and that really doesn't hurt to say, because its honest. But because he has Jake it makes it easier. I know this is going to make me look like a shitty mother, but I will admit things about his father and I that I could care less about. But, right now Wyatt doesn't need anything more and I am glad he is strong enough to do things on his own. He follows Jake so much, he mimicks him and is almost his shadow that I would never take this from him. I cant and I wont.

Oh, and with all the talk of Wyatt. His 5th birthday is coming close and I am debating a small party for him maybe on Saturday? His birthday is the 21st so.. I mean, I don't know many of the parents at his school, but I do know he has found a few friends of mine has taken as his and wonder if I threw a tiny party if anyone would like to join us for some cake and ice cream and Wy-time?* Harmony you and your kids are more than welcome to join us, Lexi, Father Daniel, Hanna? Anyone else? Anyone with kids maybe? Besides, that of obviously family is an automatic. We have already settled on a Spiderman or dragon cake. Who wouldve thought? My little man is growing up fast..

And just to end this, I will need to know about birthday stuff soon. Because after Christmas Jake and I have decided something special, a tradition to start of sorts. We're heading up north where they have some more snow, a vacation type place where Wyatt can play in the white, cold stuff and we can just take a break. And I've always wanted to see snow, well actually see it longer than a day. Baby, don't forget to put word in at work. It won't be fun without you! And well Im off to bed, to pee, or somewhere that Piper will let me relax.



*[OOC: Im just going to say the party happened, not thread it. So, just please let me know if youd like to be included as if your character will be/was there.]

I'm thinking of bringing in another character now that im settled in here in Casa Grande, AZ. BIG MOVE. Anyone need someone in particular? anyone need a line filled?

♥ Steph